I can still remember the first time I took my original step towards SOULworks and the leaps upon leaps of faith it took to ride out my inner and outer storms. It was back many years and moons ago as I started to open up to my life path, listening to my guidance more, and venturing to talk to my family about the inner workings of my soul. A crazy place to be sometimes that’s for sure, but also breathtakingly beautiful with moments of healing, expansiveness of higher consciousness, synchronistic unfoldments, miraculous events, and the privilege that comes when exploring our individual and collective potential.
Despite the beauty within my life path, the changes and upheavals have always been pretty darn scary. I remember there being so many unknowns. Would my family and friends disown me? Had I truly experienced the events as I had remembered? Would my family be ridiculed? Could we sustain the financial strain? Would I ever be able to live up to the expectations I placed upon myself and my life path? Was the transparency of my life experiences worth the heartache that came with putting myself out there so raw and vulnerable to being judged or feared? Could I survive the changes at hand and keep it all together? So many unknowns, and yet the calling was still there, like an inner and outer voice calling to my soul. The only viable path in my mind was to be brave enough to step into the unknown.
The same process unfolded many times in my life. Every key moment in time there were definitely many unknowns. From publishing my first book, to opening SOULworks Sacred Healing Centre, writing my second book, expanding the store, offering my School of Enlightenment, republishing my books under SOULworks Publishing, standing on local stages explaining my life’s work…so many steps into the unknown. So many moments when I had to trust there was a higher power guiding me through each and every step of the way.
Over the years, the unknowns are still there but my questions have changed. Was I willing to brave the changes at hand? Did I want my family to endure the upheaval? Was it worth continuing to explain events I knew full well had unfolded but others questioned or challenged? Did I want to live up to the expectations that had been placed upon my soul? Did I want to continue with the financial strain? Would I prefer a life of quiet solitude? Did I still want to teach? Am I willing to finish my third book? Was there any point to the last seven years of personal tribulation? Was seven years enough and was I ready to throw in the towel? Would I withstand the storm? Even if I could, did I really want to continue down this path or was I done with all this soulful adventure?
Amidst the COVID-19 pandemic, my questions have escalated. I assume everyone is in the midst of their own inner dialogue and have felt the same rise of self-reflection and priority shifts. Family and loved ones are centre stage of course, but so too are our own inner callings and SOULworks. There would be no balance if we did not put ourselves equally into the equation. However, when we are faced with our very human mortality, vulnerability, and witness crisis escalating around the globe, we definitely start to ask ourselves new questions.
For many of us, the unknown is here whether we want to walk that path or not. The truth is though, there have always been unknowns. Regardless of how many life decisions and paths we have journeyed both individually and collectively, it has never been completely sure footed. There has always been an element of true surrender and trust that there is a bigger picture in motion waiting to be discovered. For myself, the truth of our current reality comes down to just one question: am I still willing to step into the unknown?
And the answer deep within me is undeniably yes. Which leaves only one viable path worth taking, being brave enough to step into the unknown.
After seven years of always being here and watching both my own SOULworks and spiritual community grow, I am officially closing the doors and walking away for a time. Rest assured I will resurface though, somewhere, somehow. In truth I already have. I have already returned beyond the collective void of chaos, secrets, hardships, false teachings, and the misconceptions of our shared history. I have found the strength to believe in myself and my own voice amidst the disarray of both spoken and written word. I am finally free.
And I promise, I will see you on the other side.
Love and Blessings,
Lauren Heistad